Chapter 20: When to Seek Help

Remember that chill friend who always seems to have it together? The one who can handle just about anything without breaking a sweat? Well, even the most Zen-like individuals can hit their limit when it comes to stress. It happens to everyone.
Sometimes, stress is a bit like a mischievous monkey. It might tap you on the shoulder and say, "Hey, wanna go for a ride on the stress rollercoaster?" We can usually handle these little monkey moments with a few deep breaths and a good night's sleep.
But what happens when that monkey starts throwing bananas, and the rollercoaster goes off the tracks? That’s when it’s time to call in the professionals.

The Stressometer: Signs It's Time to Call in the Pros

Let’s face it, stress can be a sneaky little rascal. It doesn’t always shout its presence, sometimes it whispers in the shadows, slowly wearing you down. It’s like having a low-grade fever. You might feel a little off, but you try to push through it.
But just like a fever, ignoring the signs of unmanageable stress isn’t a good idea. It can lead to bigger problems.
So, how do you know when your stress monkey needs an intervention? Here are some classic signs:

• Your sleep schedule is all over the place. You're either tossing and turning all night or crashing out on the couch at 7 pm.
• You're snapping at everyone. Your patience is thinner than a slice of prosciutto, and you're feeling irritable even over the smallest things.
• You're constantly exhausted. It’s like your body is running on fumes, and coffee just isn’t cutting it anymore.
• You're avoiding things you used to enjoy. It’s no fun when even your favourite activities feel like a chore.
• You’re consistently overwhelmed and anxious. You feel like you're drowning in a sea of tasks and responsibilities.
• You’re experiencing physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, or digestive issues. Your body is literally screaming for you to slow down.

If these symptoms sound familiar, it might be time to reach out for help. It doesn’t mean you’re weak or incapable. It means you’re taking care of yourself.

Beyond the 'Self-Help' Shelf: Exploring Your Options

So, you've acknowledged that your stress levels need a little TLC. You've tried all the self-care tips, from bubble baths to meditation apps, but you're still feeling stuck. That’s okay, it’s time to consider professional help.
There are many different types of therapy out there, and finding the right fit for you is key. Here are a few common options:

• Counseling: This is a general term for talking therapy. Counselors can help you work through a variety of issues, including stress, anxiety, relationship problems, and more.
• Psychotherapy: This is a more intensive type of therapy that focuses on exploring your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Psychotherapists often use specific techniques like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) to help you manage stress and develop coping skills.
• Support Groups: These can be a great way to connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Sharing your struggles and hearing about others’ journeys can be incredibly helpful and validating.

Remember, there's no shame in seeking help. It takes strength and courage to reach out and ask for support.

Finding the Right Fit: Choosing a Therapist or Counselor

Choosing a therapist or counselor can feel a bit intimidating. Think of it like finding a great pair of jeans – it takes a little trial and error to find the perfect fit.
Here are some tips for finding the right therapist for you:

• Ask for referrals: Talk to your doctor, friends, or family members for recommendations.
• Check with your insurance company: They may have a list of therapists in your network.
• Look online: There are websites where you can search for therapists in your area.
• Schedule a consultation: Most therapists offer a free consultation so you can get a feel for their approach and style.
• Consider your individual needs: Think about what you want to get out of therapy. Do you need help managing anxiety, working through trauma, or building better communication skills?
• Trust your gut: It's important to feel comfortable and safe with your therapist. If you don't feel a connection, don't be afraid to keep looking.

The First Step: Resources and Getting Started

Ready to take the leap? Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you get started:

1. Make a list of your concerns: What are your biggest stressors? What are your goals for therapy?
2. Research therapists in your area: Use online search tools or ask for referrals.
3. Schedule consultations: Make a few calls and see if you can set up consultations.
4. Trust your intuition: Go with your gut feeling about the therapist.
5. Make the first appointment: Take the first step and schedule your initial appointment.

Remember:

You’re not alone. Millions of people seek therapy each year. It’s a sign of strength, not weakness.

Time to Take a Banana Break

If your stress monkey is throwing bananas and the roller coaster is off the rails, don't be afraid to call in the pros. You deserve to feel happy, healthy, and balanced.
This chapter is just a starting point. You can find many resources online and in your community to help you navigate this process. The most important thing is to take the first step.
Be kind to yourself, and remember, you’ve got this.

Try this exercise

Ready to get a handle on your stress? This exercise will help you identify your stress levels and create a personalized action plan.

Step 1: The Stress Self-Assessment

Take a few minutes to honestly answer the following questions. There are no right or wrong answers, this is just for you.

• How often do you feel overwhelmed or anxious?
• Do you find yourself snapping at others more easily than usual?
• Are you having trouble sleeping or waking up feeling exhausted?
• Are you avoiding things you used to enjoy?
• Have you noticed any physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, or digestive issues?

Step 2: Evaluating Your Options

Based on your answers, consider the following:

• If you answered "yes" to several questions, it might be time to explore professional help. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength.
• If you answered "yes" to a few questions, you might need to try some additional self-care strategies or consider reaching out to a trusted friend or family member for support.
• If you answered "no" to most questions, that's great! You're likely doing a good job of managing your stress. However, it's always a good idea to practice self-care regularly to prevent stress from building up.

Step 3: Taking Action

Here’s a plan for your next steps:

• If you’re feeling overwhelmed, start by taking small, manageable steps. Focus on getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and finding ways to relax and unwind each day.
• If you’re considering therapy, take a look at the resources in Chapter 20. Start by making a list of therapists in your area and scheduling a consultation.
• If you’re unsure about what to do, talk to your doctor or a trusted friend or family member for advice and support.